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An Intervention is in Order: Canine Bullies in a Multiple Dog Household

An Intervention is in Order: Canine Bullies in a Multiple Dog Household

It used to be called being dominant, and in some circles it still is, sadly. But this behavior is actually simple bullying. As with humans, bullying is always inappropriate. It can arise for several reasons, among them insecurity, anxiety, juvenile behavior in young adults and puppies and just plain old bad manners.

Being a bully has nothing to do with the breed of the dog who is the bully. Any breed can be a bully. Puppies who are very exuberant and having difficulty learning impulse control are prime targets to become a bully when allowed unchecked in a multiple dog household. Possessing a good temperament otherwise will not prevent a puppy from becoming a bully. One can be a canine bully and be a nice dog otherwise, which is where this act typically differs with human bullies.

Posturing Dogs

Those who have children and who are raising them with limits and guidelines that are parentally enforced will understand this advice immediately. Dogs are not furry children (see here for more on that) but they are equally in need of structure and knowing what is appropriate or not. It is very important to set limits and provide said structure.

We as humans are not meant to be “pack leaders”; dogs know that we are a different species; I can assure you of this! What we are meant to be, however, is the human who provides for all their needs. This includes the need for clearly communicated boundaries, guidelines, information and reward incentives as well as non-scary consequences for infractions of said rules.

Boundaries should include, but are not limited to, preventing/intervening with these inappropriate activities:
• “nagging” any other dog for any reason.
•  sniffing body parts of another dog for lengthy periods of time (especially when the receiver is obviously     uncomfortable)
• insistence on play when the other party is not interested
• ”pacing” another dog (physically matching their walking pace outside of the realm of interactive play)
• “walk bys” of another dog (seemingly benign walking by another dog with the intent of intimidation)
• body slamming another dog in greeting
• being “in your face” intrusive without an invitation to do so
• any posturing meant to intimidate.

Buy the book, How Many Dogs?! click here

The list is longer than the above but it’s nearly impossible to include every scenario. Multiple dog households parents really owe it to themselves and their charges to educate themselves on dog body language and appropriate play. There are several ways to do this. There are a few well done books available that have great information on body language as well as the go-to DVD on this subject by Sarah Kalnajs. The newest option for this is Lili Chin’s fabulous “Doggie Body Language“. Another option is to attend organized playgroups that are supervised by behavior professionals familiar with both positive reinforcement training and dog body language. Watching the interaction through their eyes can help with viewing your own crew more clearly. You get to see what needs interrupted and what doesn’t.

Positive never means permissive when inappropriate behavior is being demonstrated. It is completely possible to intervene appropriately without causing fear or using force. Human to dog body language is useful to learn for this practice. When your crew respects your ability to set boundaries in a clear and concise manner without using an iron fist, they feel safe and secure responding to your cues to cease and desist.

Often the simple act of clearing one’s throat and throwing a pointed look at the offender will be enough to interrupt poor choices in an otherwise well structured household. Quietly placing your body between the two or more dogs involved can cause an immediate deflection. This is called splitting and dogs use it too. Using what I call “the mom stance”, hands on hips with a disappointed look on your face, can stop an incident if implemented soon enough. Well marked and timed Time Outs are worth the effort to learn to implement correctly. Read here for more on that.

Those who follow my blog, know that I have a puppy in my household at present (at the time of this original writing). Puppies are rude until taught otherwise. Sometimes I intervene, sometimes another dog intervenes appropriately for me. This can be permitted if you know what is appropriate in a canine correction and what isn’t. For example Kenzo, the puppy, stole Trent’s bone and Trent did not stop him. So I retrieved it for him. It took three retrievals and a “mom” look to eliminate this behavior on this particular day. A fourth attempt on Kenzo’s part would have resulted in a time out. I give three tries on benign behavior.

But later the same evening, Kenzo tried on his big boy pants and made a posturing move towards Trent. I did not have time to intervene nor did Trent have time to object because Siri intervened for both of us, immediately and quite correctly. She split between them with her body immediately and roared a bit at Kenzo, quite appropriately, without hurting him. She did, however, make enough of an impression (based on the size of his eyes!) that I am certain that he won’t try that again soon. So while you cannot simply allow the dogs to work it out among themselves, you can periodically rely on dogs who have appropriate mediation skills.

So it is possible to have a multiple dog household with several strong personalities, without having strong conflict, if you learn how to intervene when appropriate. One of the easiest ways to help non-professionals understand how early on it can be necessary to step in is to equate what is happening to toddlers doing an equivalent behavior. If your two year old was shoving your three year old or vice versa, are you going to wait for them to ‘work it out on their own”? I certainly hope not! Don’t allow those kinds of decisions to be made in your canine household either and all will flow much more smoothly!

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Command Performance: Do Words Have Consequences?

Command Performance: Do Words Have Consequences?

I think “yes” would be the accurate answer to this question. Words like “command” and “obedience” reek of control. They are included in the “hammer” style tools of dog training. I much prefer the use of “cue” and “manners”. Like the saying goes, “When you have a hammer, everything looks like a nail.” While this statement is typically applied to actual training tools, this equally applies to the words used in training as well.

Many people assume that words, once spoken, disappear. While that can be true but what can also happen is this; quite often, the words that are used can convey a specific feeling to the person who spoke the words. Words such as command and obedience are forceful. They imply those who they are directed to are inferior and in need of domination. This could not be further from the truth in relation to the dogs in our lives.

Photo of Dawn Goehring of Comedy Barn Canines. Photo Courtesy of Christine Romano, Rich Blessings Photography

Photo of Dawn Goehring of Comedy Barn Canines. www.comedycanines.com. Photo Courtesy of Christine Romano, Rich Blessings Photography

While our dogs certainly require structure and boundaries, they don’t need such words to provide said structure. What they need is kindness, empathy, understanding, and clear communication. They are not looking to take over our world. We have the opposable thumbs, after all.

“Breaking” is another word that is better off dispensed with in regards to housetraining. While the word is appropriately descriptive of the goal that is in mind – as in “breaking the habit” – it does speak to the notion that force can somehow resolve the problem.

According to Raymond Coppinger, dogs chose to join us; domesticating themselves by stationing themselves near human camps. The ensuing partnership was mutual. We provide for their needs. They know this. There is no need to lord it over them with force. They revere us already. They respect us when we work with them rather than on them.

Buy the book, How Many Dogs?! click here

Dogs are the most forgiving creatures I know of. We treat them badly and still they adore us. Using kind words goes a long way towards promoting partnership and trust far more than words that convey the need to wield control with an iron fist. Every step taken towards dismissing such a partnership makes an additional step easier. It becomes a slippery slope.

Forceful words can cause even bigger problems in the multiple dog household. As with a multiple human household, personalities will differ among the crew. A dog that is pushier than another dog can feel emboldened by harsh words spoken at such from the humans in the household. Harshness can create bullies out of humans as well as canines. It is up to the humans to set good examples to be followed. Think of it in terms of children who are emotionally abused by their parents. While they may grow up stronger because of what they endured, there is an equal if not greater chance that they will learn how to be angry more easily than how to be kind.

Compassion and respect should not be reserved solely for one’s fellow humans. All sentient beings are deserving of this. Choosing words that you would use with humans whom you love, with the canines in your lives, will go far towards building the trust that creates a wonderful bond. Words DO matter. Choose them with care.

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