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From the Frying Pan into the Fire: Adding a Dog When Your Current Dog Has Issues

From the Frying Pan into the Fire: Adding a Dog When Your Current Dog Has Issues

Let’s say for the sake of argument that you have a human child who is difficult, with a personality disorder that needs professionally addressed. Yet you haven’t had the heart to take that step. Your child is antisocial towards everyone but your own family, and at times, including them. He is disruptive in school, openly hostile and pro-active about avoiding interactions while generally challenging any form of authority. Would you think it a good idea to suddenly decide to adopt another younger child to shower with affection? Would you expect the interactions of the new child and the troubled child to go smoothly?

Strangely, many people do exactly the canine equivalent of this. They are then vastly surprised that they have a problem on their hands. The expectation is that if you have two of the same species in the house, they should automatically get along. Why? All humans don’t get along. It would, of course, be great if that were the case, but humanity has a long way to go before we get to that point.

No one understands more than I do the temptation to add another canine to one’s household. But even I did not reach this point without planning. My last ‘singleton’ dog was adamant about remaining a singleton. I tried but at that stage of my training life, I was not skilled enough to ‘fix’ her. Layla’s behavior nearby other dogs in public was fine. I ‘fixed’ that very easily. She simply did not want to share her personal space with another canine and I grudgingly respected that. She had no other issues. She was a delightful and charming dog, enchanting every human she met. Everyone loved her and she them.

Adding another canine to a household with a dog who not only dislikes other dogs but also most humans, is a huge task to take on. Modifying that behavior won’t happen overnight. There are no magic wands. Consistency and parental boundaries are important. Because of my specialty, I get requests to help with such situations. I believe being truthful is important to achieving success. All family members must be on board in order for quality changes to take place. Realistic expectations are crucial and patience is key.

Teach delivers a correction to Tucker.

Teach delivers a correction to Tucker.

Managing the environment and setting each dog up for success is important. I often get asked, “How do I stop so and so from annoying so and so?” Easy, don’t let him do it in the first place. Setting up your household structure so that each dog feels safe and secure is important to success. Safety is high on the hierarchy of needs. Anxiety is off the charts without safety. The humans are in charge of safety. The dogs need structure, guidelines and safety. Reinforcing for appropriate choices and providing an incentive for such, helps to teach impulse control.

My job would be so much easier if simply integrating the dogs was my only requested task. Yet in so many of these cases, the resident dog in question *also* dislikes all human strangers so that has to be addressed before I can even attend to attempt to address the dog/dog situation. I do have to get access to the inside of the house, after all! (Edited to add in 2022: obviously, now I can offer virtual sessions for such and in many cases, that is indeed the better option. But honestly, in many cases that also means that I miss demonstrating some small things that can mean the difference between success and failure.)

In the worst scenarios, the owners have waited until the now larger and more confident dog has gotten fed up with the corrections he or she has endured at the paws of the other dog and has started to fight back. Get help before this point, please! Better yet, address your original dog’s issues FIRST, before you add gasoline to your fire. The amount of work that needs done once the deed is done is more than most people want to deal with. So do yourself a favor and think of what the resident dog needs rather than what you want.

If you lived through such a scenario, feel free to tell us all about it in the spaces below.

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An Intervention is in Order: Canine Bullies in a Multiple Dog Household

An Intervention is in Order: Canine Bullies in a Multiple Dog Household

It used to be called being dominant, and in some circles it still is, sadly. But this behavior is actually simple bullying. As with humans, bullying is always inappropriate. It can arise for several reasons, among them insecurity, anxiety, juvenile behavior in young adults and puppies and just plain old bad manners.

Being a bully has nothing to do with the breed of the dog who is the bully. Any breed can be a bully. Puppies who are very exuberant and having difficulty learning impulse control are prime targets to become a bully when allowed unchecked in a multiple dog household. Possessing a good temperament otherwise will not prevent a puppy from becoming a bully. One can be a canine bully and be a nice dog otherwise, which is where this act typically differs with human bullies.

Posturing Dogs

Those who have children and who are raising them with limits and guidelines that are parentally enforced will understand this advice immediately. Dogs are not furry children (see here for more on that) but they are equally in need of structure and knowing what is appropriate or not. It is very important to set limits and provide said structure.

We as humans are not meant to be “pack leaders”; dogs know that we are a different species; I can assure you of this! What we are meant to be, however, is the human who provides for all their needs. This includes the need for clearly communicated boundaries, guidelines, information and reward incentives as well as non-scary consequences for infractions of said rules.

Boundaries should include, but are not limited to, preventing/intervening with these inappropriate activities:
• “nagging” any other dog for any reason.
•  sniffing body parts of another dog for lengthy periods of time (especially when the receiver is obviously     uncomfortable)
• insistence on play when the other party is not interested
• ”pacing” another dog (physically matching their walking pace outside of the realm of interactive play)
• “walk bys” of another dog (seemingly benign walking by another dog with the intent of intimidation)
• body slamming another dog in greeting
• being “in your face” intrusive without an invitation to do so
• any posturing meant to intimidate.

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The list is longer than the above but it’s nearly impossible to include every scenario. Multiple dog households parents really owe it to themselves and their charges to educate themselves on dog body language and appropriate play. There are several ways to do this. There are a few well done books available that have great information on body language as well as the go-to DVD on this subject by Sarah Kalnajs. The newest option for this is Lili Chin’s fabulous “Doggie Body Language“. Another option is to attend organized playgroups that are supervised by behavior professionals familiar with both positive reinforcement training and dog body language. Watching the interaction through their eyes can help with viewing your own crew more clearly. You get to see what needs interrupted and what doesn’t.

Positive never means permissive when inappropriate behavior is being demonstrated. It is completely possible to intervene appropriately without causing fear or using force. Human to dog body language is useful to learn for this practice. When your crew respects your ability to set boundaries in a clear and concise manner without using an iron fist, they feel safe and secure responding to your cues to cease and desist.

Often the simple act of clearing one’s throat and throwing a pointed look at the offender will be enough to interrupt poor choices in an otherwise well structured household. Quietly placing your body between the two or more dogs involved can cause an immediate deflection. This is called splitting and dogs use it too. Using what I call “the mom stance”, hands on hips with a disappointed look on your face, can stop an incident if implemented soon enough. Well marked and timed Time Outs are worth the effort to learn to implement correctly. Read here for more on that.

Those who follow my blog, know that I have a puppy in my household at present (at the time of this original writing). Puppies are rude until taught otherwise. Sometimes I intervene, sometimes another dog intervenes appropriately for me. This can be permitted if you know what is appropriate in a canine correction and what isn’t. For example Kenzo, the puppy, stole Trent’s bone and Trent did not stop him. So I retrieved it for him. It took three retrievals and a “mom” look to eliminate this behavior on this particular day. A fourth attempt on Kenzo’s part would have resulted in a time out. I give three tries on benign behavior.

But later the same evening, Kenzo tried on his big boy pants and made a posturing move towards Trent. I did not have time to intervene nor did Trent have time to object because Siri intervened for both of us, immediately and quite correctly. She split between them with her body immediately and roared a bit at Kenzo, quite appropriately, without hurting him. She did, however, make enough of an impression (based on the size of his eyes!) that I am certain that he won’t try that again soon. So while you cannot simply allow the dogs to work it out among themselves, you can periodically rely on dogs who have appropriate mediation skills.

So it is possible to have a multiple dog household with several strong personalities, without having strong conflict, if you learn how to intervene when appropriate. One of the easiest ways to help non-professionals understand how early on it can be necessary to step in is to equate what is happening to toddlers doing an equivalent behavior. If your two year old was shoving your three year old or vice versa, are you going to wait for them to ‘work it out on their own”? I certainly hope not! Don’t allow those kinds of decisions to be made in your canine household either and all will flow much more smoothly!

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Correct Me If I’m Wrong? I Have a Better Idea

Correct Me If I’m Wrong? I Have a Better Idea

This may not strike you as a multiple dog subject and strictly speaking, it isn’t. But it’s a dog behavior subject that affects all dogs so that is multiple enough for me. I have been mulling this subject over for some time now, prompted by recent conversations I have had with a couple of people, all via internet, which is never the best venue.

Denise Fenzi at work.

Denise Fenzi training with R+.

As anyone who has either read my book or knows me in person is aware of, I am a positive reinforcement trainer. That wasn’t always the case. I started my training knowledge with the more old fashioned techniques  now known as “traditional” training.

At the time, it was simply the way that things were done. My fellow trainers and I were never intentionally harmful to the dogs that we were training or so we saw it that way. Of course the corrections that we issued to these dogs were intentional in that they were meant to be corrections. But did we see these forceful actions as harmful? Not at all. It was simply how we were told that dogs learned. But did they really learn? Sure, they did but at a cost and part of that cost was often a loss of trust. Humans are very unpredictable and can cause pain. They learned that right away. Best to avoid that pain by toeing the line that we drew. Dogs are amazingly adaptive. They can learn despite the failings of humans.

I will always have to live with the knowledge that my beloved Merlin and Kera were initially “trained” with choke chains and a harsh jerk on the leash. And let’s not forget scruff grabs and the like. My sweet Siri got far too familiar with a prong collar for during her late teenage months. Until I heard the cry of pain from one particularly enthusiastic launch forward during a hike, that is. That was the last time she had to bear that medieval device. It has made a great back gate latch since then.

My training method crossover did not happen fully overnight. I was dead set against using food rewards at first. But I attended my first positive training class with a dog from the shelter that I taught at, instructed by a local positive trainer who taught at another local shelter. I was initially horrified at the amount of food used. But I could not deny that my shelter ward for the class was attentive to what was taught. Soon I was bringing my own dog (Merlin) to the same trainer’s class with an eagerness that I never felt about my own classes. The transformation had begun.

The majority of that transformation was the fact that Merlin was not a dog that accepted corrections lightly. When they even made a dent in his consciousness, it was because he fought back. Merlin was a confident intelligent dog. He saw no need to be roughed up. When I learned a better way, the difference in attentiveness was like night and day. I had finally had the sense to give this brilliant dog the job that he had been craving. The end of his reactivity on leash to pretty much anything that moved had begun in earnest. I was delighted!

Years have passed and my knowledge has grown by volumes. My eyes have been opened. I have been thinking about this awakening in depth recently and I liken it to those pictures that get forwarded around where there are hidden images. Until you spot the image, you are confused and frustrated. Everyone else can see it, why can’t you? But then the skies clear, the image is undeniable and you wonder with amazement how you missed it even for a moment. As a dear friend says about other subjects, you can’t unsee it. Your life is forever changed. This is how I now see the balanced trainers versus positive reinforcement trainers division. I now see that image and that can never be changed. I wish they could see it too. It makes me sad that they can’t.

I will try very hard to explain this without judgment. Having been on the other side, I truly know that there is no cruel intent in most balanced trainers’ methods. I say most because some people will always take pleasure in their so called domination of another species. This is not said lightly. I have names in mind. This writing is not about those people. I do not feel that changing the view of those who feel that way is within my reach. Their path is in their control and they will follow it where they are directed to. I wish them clarity someday.

One of the questions I was asked recently was, did I think someone I know who is a balanced trainer hurts dogs? I said no initially because I truly don’t think she means to, as explained above. But after giving this more thought, the real answer is, “Yes, I do.” Using shock, jerks on choke chains or prong collars, and other physical corrections, DOES hurt. It’s designed to. That is the whole reason behind the use. Punishment does work. Correct the dog, he won’t do that again! But what does the dog learn from that? See above.

The dog in question does not change how he feels about what caused him to get issued a correction. He just learns that it hurts when he does that. It doesn’t mean he won’t do it again. It means that he will weigh his options and may choose what is more rewarding for him in the immediate moment at the expense of potential pain. This is a bad position to place a dog in.

The relationship suffers. There is no way of getting around that. There are various schools of thought that a dog should do whatever is asked simply because pleasing the human that asked is the best reward. It sure can be a huge part of it. But there are caveats to this.

That high of a value being placed on verbal acknowledgement as a reinforcement only comes with an already stellar relationship. If you are an unpredictable human and you sometimes cause pain, then you are not to be fully trusted and a verbal reinforcement will never be at the same level for a dog you are training than with a dog and human combo that has a trust filled relationship.

There, I said it. Let the flames begin. That is fact and you can spin it any way you want to try but that is how relationships work and we all know it. It’s the same with humans. Trust is trust. If you trust the person on the end of the leash to always have your back, then you will do pretty much anything for that person. Positive reinforcement training gives you and your dogs the opportunity to truly communicate with one another. It’s a two way conversation, with respect for both.

I realize that I must clarify the above somewhat. I am well aware that there are some crossover trainers who had great relationships with their dogs prior to crossing over. But I feel safe saying that these trainers have great skill with timing and that their corrections were rarely or never at the extreme end. The average dog parent who takes a class/has a private from/with a balanced trainer doesn’t have the same skill and understanding and the relationship will suffer.

Now none of this is not to say that positive trainers never lose their cool. We yell at our own dogs periodically, we have faults, we make mistakes, we are all human. But the effort to avoid having any emotional and physical pain in the name of forced compliance is a huge consideration. Again, this is not a judgment on those who I think simply have not seen that image. This is a plea to you to try to see that image. For your dogs, for the dogs you train. There is a better way.

I hear so much silliness from balanced trainers that well trained dogs trained by positive reinforcement is not the norm. We must have as our own dogs or train only soft dogs, not the dogs with drive like they train. Again, sorry to be blunt, but hogwash! I have dogs with “drive”. (what a silly term! It really just means a type A personality.) Merlin was never an easy dog to either live with or train but let me say, once I learned the right way to train, he was a pleasure! I could take him anywhere. He could be off leash standing next to a deer and he would come to me to be rewarded for ignoring said deer. I work with dogs like this all the time. I help clients turn reactivity and aggression around all the time. As with any client base, owner compliance is important to success. But success is the norm here. I am also far less worried about the damage that my clients can do to their dogs with bad timing of verbal markers and treats than giving them the permission to jerk their dog when the feel the need!

Anger is easy to escalate. Having been in this position, I say this with conviction: it’s far easier to simply jerk a leash again when “compliance” is not forthcoming than to take the moment to show the dog what you want instead. Anger begets anger. I choose to show people how to teach their dogs to make better decisions and to give their dogs a voice in the outcome of any situation. I can sleep better this way and I know that the majority of my clients do as well.

This is a subject dear to my heart so I need to curtail my ramblings now or I will fill far too many pages for this article! I will end this with some comments from other cross over trainers on what moment gave them pause to “cross over”, edited for space.

Dawn Elberson Goehring in Gaitlinburg, TN is in the entertainment business at the Comedy Barn Theater with her dogs. With a background in working with wildlife, which involves hands off training, she could not understand why leashes were needed to train a dog. So she went hands off with her trick training and found an amazing attitude with her dogs that serves her as well with training clients today.

Nan Arthur, trainer in Lakeside CA and member of the faculty at Karen Pryor Academy and author of “Chill Out Fido”, says that her defining moment was attending a class with her six month old puppy and seeing the instructor correct another dog so hard that he was slammed into a brick wall because of his barking. She walked out and found a better way.

Pat Miller, owner of Peaceable Paws in Fairplay, MD and author of numerous books on positive training as well as training editor of the Whole Dog Journal, states that her light bulb moment came when her marvelous dog Josie ran and hid under the deck when she brought out her utility dog equipment. She never looked back from that moment. It is well documented what has resulted since then!

Miranda Workman, trainer in Amherst, NY and former president of the CCPDT, offers that her Boxer who had been attacked by another dog, became reactive and was made worse by punishment based training techniques. He was no longer safe to be around. This situation helped her not only cross over but to become a professional trainer.

Casey Lomonaco, of Rewarding Behaviors Dog Training in Endicott, NY has Monty to thank for her awakening. I cannot possibly edit her story and still do it justice so simply read it for yourself here. http://projectmonte.wordpress.com/about/

All these situations have something in common: they saw the image in the picture. For those of you who have seen the image, feel free to share your story here as well. For those who have yet to see the image, if you are local, come watch me work. If you are not, call a qualified positive trainer and ask to watch her/him work. I wish you clarity.

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